Things I Think

Just another onMason site

Blindsight, from a new POV

“Looks good,” I said. “I’m going in.”

It’s my job to go first. It’s my job to lead the troops when no one else will. Or when no one else can.

I followed the grunts down the corridors of Rorschach for the first time. The walls shined with a creeping blackness I could not put my finger on. Just the mind playing tricks, I thought. Keep it together.

“Perimeter:checked…come on….down…”

I felt…odd. Again, unable to put my finger on it, I brushed off my creeping feelings. Can’t let the troops see me weak. I had to stay strong.

“Not so fast,” Szpindel said. “How are you feeling?”

How was I feeling? I didn’t know. I don’t even think I could tell you now. It was like there was a non-existent shadow, creeping behind me. My senses told me there was something there. But every time I turned in defense, there was nothing. What is this place? What have we gotten ourselves into?

“Fine. A bit-odd…”

“Odd how?” replied Szpindel.

What was it? Physically I felt fine, aside from my heart beating out of my chest from the adrenaline. That was even good. No radiation poisoning yet. But, I don’t know. There was definitely something. I could feel it. Behind me. Or, or…next to me. I don’t know.

“Mild disorientation,” I said. “Just a little spooky. Nothing too bad. Everyone get down here.”

The race was on. It was my team against the clock and I sure as shit wasn’t going to let this go bad. Not on my watch. Get it done and get out.

 

 

The team looked terrified. Constantly looking over their shoulders for make believe phantoms. The Grey syndrome was fucking with us. But that is all it was. It’s just an illusion. I heard a whisper. Just an illusion, Amanda. It called my name. Impossible.

Tesla and sieverts surged across my HUD. “Another spike. Get ready.”

No one was ready. How could they be.

“The’re beautiful…” James said. Her face was in awe.

“What? Where?” I spun around, keeping my senses as sharp as possible. There was nothing. What was she-

“I’m blind,” breathed Szpindel.

“Shit.” My team was falling apart. Think. Think. Think. Was it the radiation? Too soon. Two members down. Retreat. I yelled to Keeton, who was still somewhat responsive. We had to get Szpindel out.

“No!” Szpindel yelled. “Throw me something!”

I reached for the spare battery on my belt and lobbed it toward Szpindel. He swatted toward it, only just missing it. He’d be okay. But only if I got everyone into the tent.

“Everyone inside!” Keeton. Check. Szpindel. Check. James. Che-

Where is she.

“Get it off of me!” Cruncher was screaming behind me, tumbling and grasping its leg. The Gang thought the leg was dead and tugged at it to remove it from the body. Keeton and I had to act fast before Susan hurt herself. We grabbed the Gang and wrestled our way to the tent. James. Check. Keeton. Check. My troops were safe. I breathed a sigh of relief. I had done my job. Misson com-

 

Blackness. There was nothing. I was nothing. Not dead. Just. Not there. Nowhere. Weightless drifting. Who am I? Who. Am. I. I? I? There is no I. Only blackness. Nothing. Nowhere.

 

This is the scene where the team first goes into Rorschach, lead by Amanda Bates. I chose this scene because it was a pivotal, climactic point where the team makes alien “contact” for the first time. I wanted to take Amanda’s voice and exaggerate her militaristic point of view, illustrating how she tries to take command. But I also wanted to show that as much as she tries, she is still helpless inside Rorschach. While I was writing, I noticed that the same scene, written from both character’s points of view, is still emotionally distant. For Keeton, he is the outside observer, constantly taking metal notes, staying as uninvolved as possible. For Amanda, going into Rorschach is a job. It’s her duty. Equally jaded, both characters seem cold to me, indifferent to their emotions. Even their fear seems hushed.

 

 

 

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